Say It Like You Mean It

communication mishaps and texting

Ahh, communication. So many words to explain ourselves, yet so many times we feel like we aren’t being heard or understood. The result, we end up repeating ourselves, or using more words to explain or justify or actions. Still there is a misunderstanding, which often results in disagreements that lead to arguments. Most people don’t understand the 4 styles of communication (assertive, passive, aggressive and passive-aggressive), and don’t really understand the fact that they are not being direct and assertive. Many times, this has to do with how we are raised. If the adults in our home got their way by using aggressiveness, most likely they taught you that this is how to speak to others. If people in your home were passive and didn’t voice their preferences or were taught to take a “back seat” to others, they often become passive adults that get walked on. Why is it important to understand your style of communication?

·         Clear communication results in less disagreements and less time wasted

·         Assertive communication reduces the likelihood you will get taken advantage of by         others

·         Understanding your communication style allows you to learn ways to make changes and get more of what you want

·         Direct and assertive communication often raises other’s feelings of respect toward you, which can lead to promotion and pay raises

·         You don’t have to feel guilty about saying things you don’t mean or walk away with the feeling that you should have said something

The opinions expressed in this article are of the author and not intended to diagnose, treat or cure mental or physical conditions. If you are struggling, please contact your healthcare provider, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or Stepping Stone Foundation at 330-577-6656.